Thursday, March 17, 2011

Hasta la vista liberal news media!

The free online print alternative to the NYT we propose would not only inform and entertain, it would scare people.

Beginning March 28, visitors to will be able to read 20 articles a month without paying, a limit that company executives said was intended to draw in subscription revenue from the most loyal readers while not driving away the casual visitors who make up the vast majority of the site’s traffic.
DoF analysts project that this questionable move by the New York Times -- it coincides with an escalating assault by patriotic lawmakers on NPR's budget -- provides an opportunity to end the hegemony of the liberal media once and for all. 

In hopes of turning one liberal newspaper's blunder into a knockout blow to the liberal media, SecFear Malcolm P. Stag III has just spoken with Rupert Murdoch about organizing an emergency conference on the Future of American Journalism.

Top of the conference agenda will be a plan to get corporate America (Koch bros, News Corp, ExxonMobil, BP, Bank of America, Citibank, JP Morgan, WalMart, etc.) to subsidize a "free" online print news alternative to the Times.  It's conceivable that FoxNews could be expanded to fill this role.  

According to SecFear, the proposed news service might not only be subscription free, but advertising free.   "It's clear that the 'liberal bias' that inevitably creeps into most news accounts by professional journalists tends to create myriad headaches for American business leaders.  Fortunately, most news stories have interesting corporate angles.   And the quality of PR writing these days is such that professional journalists are pretty much redundant.  The notion of separating advertising from the content of articles needlessly adds to the cost of producing content," wrote SecFear in an email to DoF staff this morning. 

Of course, a free online news alternative to the NYT should not only inform and entertain, it should also scare people.  DoF recognizes that Americans are crying out for "news they can use" concerning the threats posed by environmental regulations, terrorists, drugs, and illegal immigrants.  Is there any good reason Americans should have to pay for news?


  1. Do you think after the destruction of the monetary system a void will be induced and a faceless entity may suggest a one nation currency to fill said void? If so, do you think that was intentional and who should do time for malicious handling of good people's tax dollars OR should we just go all the way back to the new deal era to disprove that Capitalism doesn't work after all. Round all those figureheads up & hang them all?

  2. DoF will do whatever it takes to ensure the survival of capitalism.


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Dr. Rebecca Wolf
Undersecretary for Community and New Media
United States Department of Fear