United States Department of Fear

Monday, March 10, 2014

Results of Our Assassination Poll

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"Without knowing what they ought to fear, US citizens might otherwise fail to support profitable national security initiatives."
- Malcolm P. Stag III, Secretary of Fear
DoF was established by an Executive Order signed by the Vice President in January 2004. The mandate of the agency is to promote fear in the interest of national security.

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Our moto "Timendi causa est nescire" (ignorance causes fear), was bestowed by the Vice President.
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